Bend over Abigail May is the title of the blog post pointing out this insane steak rant by one of my most favorite awesome comedians, Patton Oswalt. It’s dirty and loud and you most definitely need headphones, especially if at work or with children or grandmothers around.
“Every time you eat a steak, a hippie’s hackey-sack goes down the sewer.” –P.O.
and one more time, let’s hear it for totally rad food scumbags at Grocery Eats
The Pioneer Woman Cooks! » The Meal of Love, Part III: Pan-Fried Ribeye Steak
This is an update. I’d said in the earlier thing from Pioneer Woman Cooks that we’d had here on here before. I cannot even begin to verify that, so I’m posting her OTHER hellafanastic story (it’s a three parter actually, beginning here but that’s not about steak). This one is called the meal of love, but I am calling my entry the MEAT of love. It was a Valentine’s day story, and I’m being crass about it in retrospect, because you know ….
No really. I had a great Valentine’s day. No ribeye though. But it was great.
Anyway, here’s why we love Pioneer Woman Cooks, because of her adorable writing:
Mmmmm. Do you realize how much your sweetie (or friend or Orkin Man or aunt or dad) is going to LOVE you after you place this deliciousness in front of them?
So I didn’t set out to make Vinegar Beef, but it sure did end up that way. I found arecognizable cut of meat, a T-Bone, at the MAxima, which is Lithuanian Wal-Mart, including the smell, and brought two of them home yesterday morning.
Sheer blog poetry. Wow.
Really, the whole blog is a great adventure in cooking and living abroad and coping.
Read them all. Hopefully nobody will notice that I’ve linked them, some of these seem dangerous. This is also why I’m not even going to mention how, um, bizarre the “drawing” of “steak” is in this picture. Let’s just leave that alone.
This seems like a fairly intuitive process for “improving” steaks. Now that I’m sort of sick of buying and preparing and eating ribbyes, I think it’s time to try this. Some other people tried it, and documented it in their flickr and it sounds like it worked for them too.
See if you can figure out which tile of my recent Steak Mosaic represents that process!
I’m going to try it too, probably won’t photograph it, but I’ll definitely report back.
[UPDATE 9/19/07 19:45] I tried it, and while I was too fragging impatient to leave the Thrift-N-Save ordinary NYStrip on the grill long enough, the flavor and tenderness of the part that was cooked properly was quite good. Now, I’m not super-certain I wasn’t just experiencing a rare NYStrip with lots of salt, or if the meat actually changed character.
Take-away points: a) get used to doing steaks on the Weber-Q; b) trust the little tiny meat thermometers; c) touch test.
Apparently, cows “want” to walk around in the sunshiny green meadows, and to not be treated like machines.
I wonder if they also “feel resentment” about being cut up and grilled?
Whatever your point of view (and I hope you’re here because your point of view is that you really, really love to eat the bountiful goodness provided for our health and pleasure by God’s wonderous creation, Cattle) … I just want to say, they’re talking about DAIRY cows. It’s DAIRY cows who are trying to band together to demand better working conditions in the production of MILK! This has 100% NOTHING whatsoever to do with the cattle whose sole purpose on this earth is as a vessel for the conversion of vegetable matter into life-giving beefsteak which brings us closer to holiness.